Concern for your fellow passengers is a noble quality.
But having to worry about the condition of one of your neighbour’s bowels because of its noxious gasses is something not even the most considerate flier wants.
That’s what one passenger had to contend with recently, a situation that resulted in the below note being handed to a flight attendant asking for a tannoy announcement to be made.
• The annoying passengers we love to hate
The “fart” note Photo: Reddit/Garwee20
The note posted on Reddit by the cabin crew member’s son or daughter was written on what looks like a napkin and read: “I don’t know if you can make an announcement, but if you can you should say that whoever is farting in the area of rows 10 to 12 should definitely see a doctor because they might have ass cancer.”
We don’t think that’s the technical term for whatever ails the passenger “in the area of rows 10 to 12”, but we do feel sorry for the note’s author, presumably sat in row 11.
• The world’s most inconsiderate travellers
The post on Reddit led to more flatulence-related confessions from air passengers, which is undoubtedly one of the more serious breaches of plane travel etiquette.
One user wrote of a time when a flight attendant approached her, her husband and their toddler and pointed them in the direction of the toilet complete with a nappy-changing table.
How does one subtly show dissatisfaction with the scent in the air? Photo: Fotolia/AP
“She then offered us a plastic bag to put his diaper in,” the user wrote. “At this point, though I already knew he hadn’t pooped, I checked his diaper and said: ‘Sorry, but that smell isn’t coming from our child.’
“It was funny and a little embarrassing and she apologised. Not sure who the stink factory in our section, but for once, it wasn’t the toddler.”
Apparently farting on a plane is an actual scientific issue, with academics discussing the effects of the change in air pressure on the human stomach.
Indeed, a report into pilot flatulence once found that more than 60 per cent have reported feeling regular abdominal bloating.
Meanwhile back on Reddit, another user pondered: “So what is the proper etiquette for farting on a plane?”
A rather unhelpful: “Go outside.”